ALICE COOPER may have the album of the year!
If you don't like rock music, or, if you've always had an animus against Alice Cooper (or if you have no muscial taste, are dead, or are Dana Carvey's CHURCH LADY) you may not like this album. Otherwise, you will join me (rogue evolent) and hail this new release by ALICE as one of the most fun come-back albums in many a wolf-man moon. What helps is that it is superbly produced with great fidelity/stereo sound and crisp, clean mixing. The produce is legendary Bob Ezrin who teamed successfully with ALICE back on 1976's WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE. ALICE's vocals are a bit deeper and tighter (just a bit) and he can no longer quite hit all the same high notes, but he sings with command and great humor. The band is smoking hot. This has become my official HALLOWEEN ALBUM for 2011.
TRACK by TRACK REVIEW:
Track 1) I AM MADE OF YOU - -
This is the song that has received the most (and really not all that much) criticism. For a few bars it sounds like ALICE is using autotune to sing with that warbly (used in cRAP) and anoying nascent echo-y Cher sound. I have been told by reliable musicologists, that he is not-- It's all Alice Cooper. But the song itself is simply a great soaring, anthemic rock ballad. Think of Styx only waaay better. It's melodic with a very catchy chorus. The blistering guitar riffs are set off against Alice's ROB HALFORD like singing (reminds me of Rob's vocals on Judas Priest's Retribution). The song is just so darn "epic" and would have made a great movie credits tune. 6.5 out of 10.
Track 2) CAFFEINE --
Track 3) THE NIGHTMARE RETURNS - -
The first 34 seconds (or so) of this brief 1:13 track is a building and soaring orchestral crescendo. There's a real Danny Elfman (for a Tim Burton stop-mo film) vibe going on in this piece - - not that that's a bad thing.
6 out of 10.
Track 4) A RUNAWAY TRAIN - -
This is one of the album's better "story-songs" wherein the protagonist of this nightmarish opera finds himself waking up on a train filled with living dead men all chained together heading for hell. This song also demonstrates the top-notch musicianship of Alice's recording musicians. This is just A+ studio work. Alice sings about "sleeping in the grave-yard on the wrong side of the dirt" and makes it fun for us Halloweenie rockers. 8 out of 10.
Track 5) LAST MAN ON EARTH - -
This is one of the best tracks on the Cd... maybe the best. On this tune Alice sings like a more melodic version of Tom Waits backed by a Balkan-Gypsy-Ragtime-Honkey Tonk-Circus Carnival vibe. Again, the musicianship is tight with some nice fiddle-like accompaniment (shades of Stephane Grappelli) 10 out of 10.
Track 6) THE CONGREGATION
A brief and slower acoustic section of guitar strumming EXPLODES into a driving syncopated concert sing-a-long (think of the fun of Gary Glitter's chorus on Rock n' Roll Pt. 2) This song has some great lyrics (homage to Dante) about Alice's character being shown various rooms in the underworld on his trip through Hell. I love the fact that the worst "room" in Hades seems to be the one filled with "Lawyers, Pimps and Mimes!" :)
In the end, you know you're going to fry. 9 out of 10.
Track 7) I'LL BITE YOUR FACE OFF - -
How can you not like a song with a title like that? The song is okay too. The theme is naturally about a deadly "femme fatale." There is a nice keyboard slow-down interlude at about 2:40 that works well. It's a fun song worth 6.5 out of 10.
Track 8) DISCO BLOODBATH/BOOGIE FEVER - -
A cornucopia of COOPER genius penetrates this mess of blended-bourbon. The song has some nice "Industrial" instro that morphs into a "synth-80's" vibe before errupting into a faux MTV kind of Rap Vanilla Ice? :) White men can't rap. While I was almost ready to dismiss it with a "meh!" Alice won me completely over with a Russian-sounding military chorus (or Orthodox church :) ) that reminded me of the Wicked Witch of the West's Castle Guards singing as they marched into her castle. There's also a volcanic axe solo and segue back into the conclusion. 6.5 out of 10 was going to be my original rating until the whole thing delivered itself as a masterpiece...so 8 out of 10.
Track 9) GHOULS GONE WILD - -
If the Monkees, Beach Boys and Bay City Rollers had mated with the Misfits and Phil Spector's produced Ramones, this is the song they might have made... if they were writing a song for an episode of the BRADY BUNCH on ACID. Just a very catchy, "bubblegum-Goth" song. 7 out of 10.
Track 10) SOMETHING TO REMEMBER ME BY - -
A beautiful ballad that should be a huge hit. If terrestrial radio still gave a crap THIS song would be everywhere. This is proof that Alice's voice is still better than most rockers and balladers forty years his junior. Remember the great Eric Carmen (Carmen not Cartman, i.e. the Raspberries) when he was "on?" ..... yeah.... Alice does him one better. 9 out of 10.
Track 11) WHEN HELL COMES HOME - -This is the only song on the album that I did not really like. My problems with the tune stem from it's theme of spousal and child abuse rather than anything lacking in the song itself. It's just tooo dark for my taste. It's music fits its theme by being heavy, sludge-like and gritty. Nonetheless the execution (yeah, pardon the pun) of this story-song of revenge is fully realized, so .... 6 out of 10.
Track 12) WHAT BABY WANTS - -
This is the big (well, 'middlin') duet of ALICE and girly-hip hop-R&B songstress Kesha. She sings with a Shania Twain evil twin attitude of bemused humor and the song actually works. It's part catchy dance-song and part stadium sing-a-long fun, with a pure 80's feel chorus. It fits well within the Alice Cooper canon. 6.5 out of 10.
Track 13) I GOT TA GET OUTTA HERE - -
THIS IS MY FAVORITE SONG on the Cd. It starts and ends with a mourning, tolling church bell. Powerful guitar work (think Buckethead or the Edge) great story-song lyrics, and a brilliant Tom Petty-esque turn of vocals by Alice (he out-Tom Petty's Tom himself :) ) makes this story of waking up in Hell ironic, clever, and a ton o' HALLOWEEN FUN! If George Harrison and Roy Orbison had ever made a sarcastic horror song about death this would have been it.
WHAT PART OF DEAD DON'T YOU GET the choir asks Alice. LOL
This song easily rates an 11 out of 10.
Track 14) THE UNDERTURE - -
This is 4:32 of recapitulating the album's major musical themes and melodies. This shows the genius of Bob Ezrin and his recording team. The faux orchestral synths bespeak "power metal meeting the Trans Siberian Orchestra," or maybe.... Jim Steinman (Meat Loaf era) meeting Styx's Dennis DeYoung. 10 out of 10.
Track 15) UNDER THE BEAD - -What monstuh/horror fan does not resonate to a song about things under the bed that talk, plot, scheme, and kill - - - they kill Alice's cat: "all that was left was a tail, a paw, and an ear." :)
A great horror song. 7.5 out of 10.
Track 16) POISON - -
This song (along with tracks 17 and 18) are live recordings and make an otherwise superb Cd into my own ALBUM OF THE YEAR!!!!!
The fans singing along (knowing all the words) bespeak an iconic performer who is loved and appreciated by a fan base that may be old and non-important, but still one that cares about the legacy of a true Rock n' Roll titan. POISON is one of Alice's greatest songs, and as popular as it was, it could/should have been even bigger. If only he had recorded it originally in the mid 70's. It's as good as anything KISS ever did.
10 out of 10 for this raucous live version.
Track 17) NO MORE MISTER NICE GUY - -
Well, I'm an old guy who fell in love with ALICE the first time I heard
"SCHOOL's OUT." I remember driving around Fort Wayne in my Dad's Buick Skylark (and then later my orange Ford Pinto) with my best pal Spoiler (aka Bookman187) listening to NO MORE MISTER NICE GUY. It was a mega cool song back then... and it's still a perfect rock song. I was going to give it 11 out of 10... but.... as I was roaring down Highway K-10 from Kansas City to my house, Cd player blasting my eardrums to my own NIGHTMARE of NOISE.... the crowd (and me) singing to the top of my lungs all the words with Alice.... I'm just grateful no Highway Patrol pulled me over. As the song hit it's stride, my car, may have gone over the speed limit (a tad :) )
Friends.... it was 1973 all over again. Alice Cooper is King!
20 out of 10.
And lastly
Track 18) THE BLACK WIDOW - -
While never one of my favorite Cooper songs, it's theme, lyrics, and chorus all "boot burro." And the opening sound-track speech by the one-and-only King of Celluloid Terror Mr. VINCENT PRICE, makes the song a true theme song for all of us monster-kids. 10 out 0f 10.
If you purchase just one Cd this year for HALLOWEEN.... rogue evolent recommends ALICE COOPER'S WELCOME 2 MY NIGHTMARE (2011).
10 out of 10.
thanks Spoiler :)
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